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28

Finding Community When You Feel Alone

Posted by Collaborative Counseling

Loneliness is a common human experience, yet it can feel incredibly isolating. Whether due to life transitions, moving to a new place, or simply feeling disconnected, the absence of community can impact both mental and physical health. The good news is that finding community when you feel alone is possible—often starting with small, intentional steps.

Why Community Matters for Mental Health

Humans are wired for connection. Belonging to a supportive community can:

  • Reduce stress and anxiety
  • Increase resilience during hard times
  • Boost self-esteem and sense of purpose
  • Provide emotional and practical support

When you feel alone, seeking out community is not just about socializing—it’s about nurturing your overall well-being.

Steps to Finding Community When You Feel Alone

1. Start With Shared Interests
Joining a class, club, or group based on hobbies—like book clubs, sports leagues, or art workshops—provides built-in opportunities to meet people with common interests.

2. Volunteer Your Time
Helping others not only contributes to your community but also builds meaningful connections. Volunteering reduces loneliness and fosters a sense of purpose.

3. Explore Support Groups
For those struggling with mental health, grief, or life changes, support groups (both in-person and online) offer understanding and shared experiences.

4. Connect Digitally, But With Intention
Online communities can provide real connection when used mindfully. Seek spaces that encourage positivity and belonging, rather than comparison or judgment.

5. Nurture Existing Relationships
Sometimes community starts closer than we think. Reaching out to a friend, family member, or coworker can reignite meaningful bonds.

Overcoming Barriers to Connection

Feeling anxious about meeting new people is normal. Some strategies to ease the process include:

  • Starting with small, low-pressure interactions
  • Setting realistic expectations—it takes time to build trust
  • Reminding yourself that many others are also seeking connection

Final Thoughts

Finding community when you feel alone takes courage, but even small steps can lead to meaningful bonds. Remember, community isn’t about the number of people you know—it’s about the quality of connection. By reaching out, showing up, and allowing yourself to be seen, you open the door to belonging.

👉 If loneliness feels overwhelming, you don’t have to navigate it alone. Collaborative Counseling can help you build coping strategies and find the support you need.

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07
What is EMDR therapy

We live in a day and age where technology can be consuming, but during this time of “social distancing” there are many ways that we can use technology to stay connected from a distance.

You can use apps such as Google Hangouts, FaceTime, Facebook Messenger, Skype, Zoom, and Houseparty to connect with family and friends!

1. Share with friends

Reach out to friends and family and keep them updated on how you are doing with all of your time spent at home. Share what books you are reading, shows you are watching, or small things you have accomplished throughout the day. 

2. Snail mail

Go old school, find a pen pal and write them a letter. Document what you are experiencing in this time of quarantine, then you will have these letters to look back on in years to come.

3. Virtual game night

Looking for something to do with friends while all staying in your own homes? Virtual game night! You can play charades, Heads Up, Pictionary, Drawful and many other games with a group of friends or family all through a video chat platform.

4. Cook-off

Share your favorite recipe with friends, and make each other’s favorite dishes. Video chat your meal with each other and share how your meal turned out!

Make it a little more exciting by leading your friends in a “follow-along” recipe night, and teach them how to make your favorite dish while they follow along in their own kitchen.

5. Create a virtual event

Make a Facebook event and invite some friends to join you for a virtual party. Create a virtual spa night, or “host” video game tournaments with friends. Plan to all watch the same movie or documentary together and discuss it after!

We all know that actually engaging with others face-to-face is the best type of interaction, but talking through these technological platforms allow us to stay connected in any situation.

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20

What Is Validation?

Posted by Collaborative Counseling
outpatient level of mental health care

Validation is when you listen to what another person is saying to you and reflect it back to them that you understand how they are feeling. An important thing to remember is validating is NOT necessarily agreeing with the other person. It also doesn’t mean you like what the other person is saying, doing or believing. You are simply restating back to the person what you hear them saying.

Why should we validate others?

There are many benefits to validating people, including it:

  • Shows you are listening
  • Lets people know that you care
  • Proves you understand the other person’s point of view
  • Is nonjudgmental
  • Improves communication and openness
  • Decreases conflict
  • Establishes trust

How do I validate others?

Validation involves listening to what the person is saying, stating back what you hear them saying to you and then responding to the person’s needs at that time.

For example, when talking to someone nod and make small gestures to show you are listening (e.g. say mmhmm, I see, huh). Then restate what you hear the person saying (e.g. “That really hurt your feelings”, “You didn’t like that”, “That pisses you off!” or “You’re angry!”). Respond by asking what the person needs, they may want space or a hug or to just vent a bit more while you listen.

Be mindful and avoid judging what the other person is saying. Show tolerance for the other person by working to recognize that their reaction makes sense considering his/her life situation, experiences and history even if you do not necessarily agree with that person.

What does it mean to be invalidating?

We invalidate people’s feelings when we minimize or disregard their experience. Some common examples: “Oh, you’ll get over it”, “You don’t need those friends anyway”, “It’s not that big a deal” or “You should…”.

What are the negative impacts of being invalidating?

There are many negative outcomes from not validating others’, including it:

  • Shows you aren’t listening
  • Says you don’t care or believe the other person
  • Shows you don’t understand the person
  • Is judgmental
  • Decreases openness and communication
  • Increases conflict
  • Decreases trust

The next time you are talking to your child, friend, lover, spouse or co-worker consider trying to just listen, reflect back what you hear and ask what the person needs in the moment. You may find it helps the person and also improves your relationship!!

Validation is a strong component of DBT, to learn more visit: https://www.collaborativemn.com/counseling-services/dialectical-behavior-therapy-DBT

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