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Thoughts on How to Care for Yourself When in Grief

Posted by Collaborative Counseling
Depression & Alzheimer's

The five areas of ourselves that really need extra care now are (1) your physical self, (2) your emotional self, (3) your mental self, (4) your spiritual self, and (5) your social self. Below are somethings that will help in each of these areas.


  • Good food (junk food, caffeine, & alcohol will sabotage your healing).
  • Sleep/rest – your energy field and immune system are in shock.
  • Walking in nature is healing – head for a park, zoo, or conservatory.


  • Forgiveness and total lack of blame for everyone.
  • Giving support & compassion to all others who are suffering now in this.


  • Get a clear & total understanding of what lead up to the tragedy.
  • Do not make any major decisions for a while.
  •  Silence and calming music will help you heal.


  • Ask God/your Higher Power to allow you to feel his love & support.
  • Know that time always heals.


  • Your family cares about you and wants your well-being.
  • Calm conversations with other family members will help you.
  • Your friends want to help; let them know ways in which they can-
  • Suggest making a meal, walking the dog, doing laundry- anything that seems to be a burden right now. This will help them.

If anyone causes you anxiety, remove yourself from them- some people are negative by nature and will be toxic for you & your recovery.

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Thoughts For Those Who Have Lost a Loved One to Suicide

Posted by Collaborative Counseling
individuals in group therapy

Losing a loved one to suicide can be a very painful experience for those of us left behind. Here are some potential perspectives or reframes to your sadness. These were written by someone who lost their son to suicide and used these various thoughts or perspectives to help cope with their sadness. We hope you too can find some help in these thoughts.

Things To Keep In Mind

  • You will not always feel the pain this deeply. Time does heal. A walk in nature ~ or having a dog or a cat will bring amazing comfort to you.
  • It is important to know that your loved one’s anguished mental condition prevented them from thinking clearly.
  • It is important to be grateful that in their anguish, your loved one did not cause the death of any other people, as is sometimes the case.
  • A heathy person’s primary desire is to protect their life in any way they can. Therefore, when a person chooses to end their life, it is their decision, and no one else is responsible.
  • God is a god of love and compassion, and knows the heart of each of us. It is not possible for God to stop loving anyone, especially one in such deep distress. Therefore, your loved one rests in the heart of God. He will listen when you ask for Him to hold your loved one in compassion, and heal their broken heart and mind. He will also heal your broken heart, and the hearts of all of those who ask for this gift.
  • Life is eternal and we will one day be reunited with all of our loved ones, especially this precious one.
  • The greatest gift you can give this loved one is to hold them in your heart with complete love and gratitude, knowing that they are being healed, and rest in the heart of God. Only fear and anxiety can hold them back from this immersion in love. So be at peace, and offer thanks for your time with them.
  • Two of the greatest enemies of our peace of mind are hunger and fatigue. Therefore, it is your duty, to yourself, to eat well and regularly – and to rest often and enter sleep with a peaceful heart.

We Are Here To Help

If you are looking for support in this difficult time, visit our website  to learn how we can help https://www.collaborativemn.com/counseling-services/individual-counseling

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What is the Difference Between Depression and Mourning?

Posted by Collaborative Counseling
Depression & Alzheimer's

Depression Versus Mourning

Depression and mourning hold a lot of similarities. However, depression is different from mourning. Mourning is viewed as a longer, ongoing sadness that impacts the person’s ability to function effectively in life. Everyone mourns differently. Therefore, someone in mourning could potentially meet the criteria for a Major Depressive Episode. With this in mind, maybe we haven’t given enough thought to whether some people who are depressed are grieving a loss of some kind.

One In the Same?

In a recent conversation with a friend, she posed the question: Is depression a type of mourning? Maybe some people with depression are grieving the way they wish things were. We do know that depressed people tend to view the world in more negative ways. However, maybe it goes deeper than that.

Maybe, the negativity we see in the thinking of depressed people is about their grief and loss of relationships or career dreams. Maybe, even family ideals or visions of success they saw for themselves.

Of course, by no means do I suggest everyone who is depressed is grieving or in mourning. However, I do believe that some people may be.

Ultimately, depression varies in how it develops and presents for each individual. I think the thoughts above remind us to treat each person as an individual. By better understanding those in mourning and in depression, we can undoubtedly better help them to overcome their struggles.

Learn more at: https://www.collaborativemn.com/counseling-services/individual-counseling

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